[Guide] How to Invisible and Other Advices of Non-Failness

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by ImSpartacus, Mar 23, 2013.

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Who's the best guide maker?

  1. Godly Spartacus

    100.0%
  2. Champion Spartacus

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Multiple votes are allowed.
  1. ImSpartacus

    ImSpartacus nerf spec plz

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    You all suck at being invisible. I'm here to help you suck less.

    Why should I be invisible, Emperor Spartacus?

    Because you suck even more at not being invisible.

    Oh majestic Spartacus, how will I ever become invisible and watch attractive men, such as yourself, in various states of undress?

    Slow down, Harry Potter. You'll need a lot more than invisibility to enjoy my supple body. That gets explained in the next guide. Right now, you just need to worry about being invisible and not catching your house on fire while you're doing it.

    Of course gorgeous Spartacus, how can I begin to not engulf my house in flames and become invisible?

    Since you're probably Polish, I'll have to take this very slow for you. Try not to drool on your cute little clown costume.

    [​IMG]

    • A This is how you registered. ... You did register, right? Fuck it, that'll be another guide.
    • B This is where you find a "FAQ" or something like that. It's in all capital letters, so you probably shouldn't click it.
    • C Wait a minute, we already went over this one. Apparently, someone thought that they needed to include this twice. Maybe they have experience dealing with people like you.
    • D This is where you find out the names of all of the people that will be yelling at you in a few days. Don't check it yet. Ignorance is bliss.
    • E In case you forget the date, they conveniently placed this calendar here for you. In your case, you may want to review what day is coming after this one and the one after that. It never hurts to be prepared.
    • F If you managed to miss the register button once, you probably don't deserve to be invisible. You don't even deserve to be called Polish. Go back to the UK.
    • G This is where you search the thousands of worthless posts on this forum. None of them are really much better than any other, so you might as well not use this.
    • H This might actually cause you to find a remotely productive conversation. Don't risk it. Just go straight to Suggestions.
    • I This is what you click when you're still fooling yourself into thinking that you care about the new things that get posted. Just come to terms with yourself now and save yourself a lot of therapy.
    • J If you're still paying attention, you are either hopped up on Adderall or... fuck it, you're probably playing with your anime doll or something. Whenever you get back to the guide, try to type your username in the box.
    • K You're precious. You think you spelled your username right, don't you? Ok, I'll play along. Try to type your password. You're adorable.
    • L You're probably not coming back to this cesspool, so you shouldn't waste any of your limited mental capacity on figuring out how checkboxes work. Pretend this one wasn't here.
    • M When you futilely believe that you have successfully entered your friend's your own credentials, you have to click this.

    [​IMG]

    • N Stop. Just don't touch anything, including this. I know it's shiny and you're blood sugar is low, but you really don't need to do anything. Maybe you could take a nap? Have a fap? Perhaps you can just sit there and clap? Fuck you, I'm a lyrical genius.

    [​IMG]

    • O Whew, that was close. Now click this and we can continue. No, wait, just click it. What are you...
    • P Yes, it's a button. I know you didn't know that. Yes, it is fascinating, but we need to click the button next to O.
    • Q For fuck's sake, this isn't what we're here for. I know, it seems like Trickster put all of this shit here just to keep you from being invisible. No, you can't click any of them.
    • R I swear to whatever fucking deity you pray to, do not go down there. You won't come back the same person.

    [​IMG]

    • S This is another temptation from Trickster. You've come too far to give up on me now. Stay strong.
    • T This sends you back to where you were. We don't want to go backwards, now do we?
    • U This is where you edit your signature. Your signature is that vain space at the end of each post where you can put witty bullshit that people can read when your posts severely lack any interesting content. This is an invisibility guide, not a signature guide. I don't move mountains. Onward.
    • V You know that cute yahoo email that you signed up with? Well if you don't want Trickster to giggle every time he tries to steal your personal information, you might want to change it to a manly email. Oh and that password that you finally remembered? Now you can change it to something memorable. Yeah, you say you're going to do that after you finish this guide, but you won't. Good luck logging back in, brah.
    • W Jesus Christ, we're almost there. You don't care what this does, just move on.
    • X X marks the fucking spot, bitches. We're almost there!
    • Y What are you doing? You don't need to bother with your avatar. Dude, you're better than this. What are you going to put there, a black and white baby?
    • Z I don't even know what this does. I am not responsible if clicking on this button results in violent sodomy.
    • α Yes, I ran out of Latin letters... Seriously though, no one uses subscribed threads.
    • β Lol, Blizzy got butthurt and gave me an infrac.
    • γ Don't you dare mess with this. This sends you all over the forums. Get back to the X!
    • δ Forget you.

    [​IMG]

    • ε We made it! This is it! Click this checkbox and then you've almost done it.
    • η Yeah, I'm skipping zeta. Dude, no one can write zeta. Screw you, this is my guide. ...oh and V card, lol.

    [​IMG]

    • θ B-b-b-bonus round! While we're here, we better make the world a better place. Uncheck this. Signatures are for tools.
    • λ Uncheck this one too. No one likes your black and white baby.
    • μ Since you love my gifs, you better leave this checked.
    • ν Lol, a "help" page? You don't need that shit, you have me.
    • π Unless you really hate yourself, just leave this one alone.
    • ρ Change this one to 40 per page. Switching pages is for schmucks. You may be a Pole, but you're not a schmuck, right?
    • σ All threads are good, so you might as well leave this one alone.

    [​IMG]

    • φ Now that we've made you invisible and generally awesome, you just need to scroll down to click this button.
    • ω Convienently, Trickster likes to fuck with people by putting the reset button right next to the save button. Yes, he's a dick. No, this guide won't help you not click reset. Just do what I do and be amazing.

    Humble Spartacus, I did what you said, but how do I know if I'm invisible?

    You'll not be uninvisible. You might even get a kickass asterisk next to your name in the active user list:
    [​IMG]

    So yeah, look at this unrelated gif:
    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Mar 23, 2013
  2. flasche

    flasche Member Staff Member Moderator

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    dafuq did i just not read?
     
  3. ImSpartacus

    ImSpartacus nerf spec plz

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    [​IMG]
     
  4. -=]Kane[=-

    -=]Kane[=- Member

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    Awesome guide, would read again 10/10
    Can't wait for the next guide explaining how to enjoy ImSpartacuse's supple body.
     
  5. McGyver

    McGyver Experimental Pedagogue

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  6. LordDz_2

    LordDz_2 Strange things happens here

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    You need a hobby.
     
  7. w00kie

    w00kie Mustachioed Mexican

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    A different hobby then that, I guess.
     
  8. iMacmatician

    iMacmatician Member

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    The Profile Picture is the (non-avatar) picture on your profile.

    You also missed xi.

    [​IMG]
     
  9. .:.HeXi.:. emcalex329

    .:.HeXi.:. emcalex329 Member

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    Oh come on, a xi is just an epsilon with squiggles.
     
  10. Candles

    Candles CAPTAIN CANDLES, DUN DUN DUN, DUN DUN DUN DUN.

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    I prefer ∂ myself, it doesn't even have a proper name.
     
  11. .:.HeXi.:. emcalex329

    .:.HeXi.:. emcalex329 Member

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    I thought that that was just a weird looking delta.
     
  12. Candles

    Candles CAPTAIN CANDLES, DUN DUN DUN, DUN DUN DUN DUN.

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    Nope, it's the symbol for partial differentiation. It's derived from delta, but the poor thing doesn't have it's own actual name.
     
  13. ImSpartacus

    ImSpartacus nerf spec plz

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    After zeta, I just used the ones that I can actually write. Xi is satan's greek letter.
     
  14. D.D.D. Destroyer

    D.D.D. Destroyer Member Staff Member Moderator

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  15. LordDz_2

    LordDz_2 Strange things happens here

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  16. Grantrithor

    Grantrithor Member

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    Seeing as how lower-case delta already sucks enough because it probably has one of the most useless uses in science, ugly crumpled up delta has it worst off because 99% of people don't even know it.

    Also, I write all of my F's as if I were writing functions, I just like the style, and I'm highly certain it's not even required to make them all curvy when writing functions, but I still write it down because it's sexy in words that have F's in them.

    The point of this post is, invisible sucks because you can't have a Who's Online party.
     
  17. BigTeef

    BigTeef Bootleg Headshot master

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    You don't need to tell me how to stalk people
    I can stalk people perfectly well.

    In-fact when your sleeping, I put my fingers in your mouth and then rub them on your cheek while making a shushing sound.

    Its okay... im watching over you....
     
  18. McGyver

    McGyver Experimental Pedagogue

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    All hail the mighty Ψ
     
  19. w00kie

    w00kie Mustachioed Mexican

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    Reminds me of something

    Hate the series as much as you want, I <3 that crap.
     
  20. BigTeef

    BigTeef Bootleg Headshot master

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